I'm here!

And alive! :)

Thank you to all of you for supporting me during my meds-not-working-so-good periods. I knew y'all would pump me up.

I'm feeling better. Still wouldn't mind sleeping all day but at least my heart's not pounding out of my chest at the thought of NOT doing that. It's a start.

My family is back from Michigan. So much for a quiet house. It was nice while it lasted but I'm glad to have them back. I kinda missed picking up the house every 2 hours! hahaha

Have TOOOOOOOOONS of pictures to sort through. 440 to be exact. I 'let' Peter take the XT with him on the condition that it be watched more closely than the children (hahah okay. I'm kidding there - well sorta kidding anyway) I guess he took me seriously because I hear he was more than semi-nazi-ish about where it was the entire trip. Good Peter.

He did good taking pictures too. I'm impressed. It doesn't come naturally to him so I was kinda surprised he got SO MANY GREAT shots. It kinda makes up for not being there.

speaking of not being there, yeah, that's the L.A.S.T. T.I.M.E I make that mistake. I hated not being with everyone and hanging with my family. I was able to spend the day with my sister-in-law, Nancy. That was a BLAST! She's super cool. So that made up for not going a little bit. :) Then she and her hubby took me and Peter's Aunt (got all that?) out of dinner. We went to Morton's (is that right?) wow! Fancy schmancy!!! Somehow an 8 dollar baker tastes better. go figure! :) Thanks you guys, that meal was AWESOME. and it was a blast hangin with ya!

So, I'll have pictures soon. I have massive work to do so bear with me. There are some good ones. It should be worth the wait :)

And thanks again for cheering me up and putting up with my drama. You are good friends!

m

feeling...

anxious, lonely. and weak.

icky is a good word.

Not that y'all want to hear me complain, but I will. Feel free to move on to a funnier, happier blog today. For now I need to be sad.

My medication must be off a bit cuz I'm feeling...ugh. Okay, well, that's not completely true. It's true I'm 'off' again but it's really because I pretty much forgot to take my meds every day. That'll mess you up. Did you know?

So I'm on them again but they don't take immediate effect so I still can't breathe, or think or start anything (much less finish anything). It's such horrible way to live...feeling like your heart is going to jump out of your body and that you can't really take a good.deep.breath.

I don't know how people do it, live with anxiety. At least I know that in a couple days, or weeks tops, I'll be back on my game.

Sent Peter, Noah and Sarah off to Michigan today for a family reunion. Not sure why I thought it was a good idea Kate and I stay home. $650 airfare (yes each) had something to do with it. Work deadlines and 2 classes did too. But right now it's sounding like the stupidest damn idea I ever had. I'm alone till Sunday. Well Kate's here. And she's funny. and cute. and I love her.

To top off my evening (of kitting two of the 8 projects I have to kit before friday night) I watched this video that was linked on ali's blog Yeah, if you're even remotely sad, don't go there. I bawled like a little baby. It definetely didn't make me feel stronger. Made me feel like "thank GOD for that dad. THANK GOD there are strong people in this world because there's no way I could handle that"

I'll have to go back when I'm not feeling so weak and check it out. I'm sure that isn't the effect they were going for. In the mean time, think about me please. I'm bummin.

What does that say?

So I have to make the teaser boards to show off my class for Scrapbooks Etc. We're supposed to change them every 4 months. So mine's due and I come up with this idea.
 
I like it. It's clean and bright. Only one problem though. Can you see? 

about a month ago...

...I took this picture. My dad was here and I decided I'd to get a couple shots off all 3 kids in one place and the same time. This is no small feat. I took advantage of daddy being here (thanks daddy!) and we went to "the big grass."
 
It's not the best picture and it's really not exactly what I was looking for. None the less, I like it. Not sure how to scrap it. I could do the typical looking forward type of thing, but I'm just not feeling that.

I'll take suggestions *hint hint* LOL 

remember that page challenge?

Well I've taken that same set of papers and did two more pages with it. It was just too cute a set to stuff it away in my "used" stack. So here they are. Can I tell you how much I love scrapbooking?!?!? AGGHH!! it just makes me happy :)

Journaling reads:
"what is it about you?
i really don't know
i don't know what it is
or where you got it.
but i do know for sure,
there's something
super cool about
u"


this one says:
"remember this
You are beautiful
You are beautiful
You are beautiful"

it only takes a second

okay well maybe 2. But this is what happens in my house when there is ANY silence.
I pretty much have two choices.
1.) I can run around, endlessly, after my kids making sure they are 'in' to anything.
2.) Or I can take a break to sit down (or use the freegin bathroom) and have blue faces to clean up.

Sometimes I choose the latter.
  

  

(if anyone is wondering why I broke this up into two posts....sometimes it's just easier to use Picasa to blog pictures but I can only do one at a time)

how did we survive?

before easy mac.

Seriously, how?. Take away my fax machine. Make me wash dishes by hand. But never, NEVER E.V.E.R. take away my easy mac.


And by the look of Kate here I's makes me some geooood mac'ncheeze :) 

cuz I can

Not much to say really. Was just going through some pictures and found this one. She's just too damn cute not to brag about :)

  

The image thing is working now. go figure. Here are some pictures from my weekend.

Here are the sunflowers Peter got me. The are super cool in real life, in this picture? not so much. I need to work on my still lifes.


This is the 'new' rug in the family room.


And this is the big one for the living room - simply love these!!!


And finally the kids all at the counter. We moved Kate from the high chair to this cute little booster seat to keep her away from the new rugs LOL An unexpected bonus on how damn cute they look all lined up like that. :)



Oh hell, this one is too cute not to post. Ignore the flower growing out of Noah's head. I completely messed that one up.

Holy crap, I'm ready to go back to work

Ya know how when you go on vacation and you need to take a vacation from your vacation? Like a vacation from yourself? Well...that's not what's going on here.

I'm exhausted but not because we went on vacation. But because I'm doing this taking-care-of-things thing in my house and mind and it's exhausting. Honestly, I thought I'd feel better. LIke lighter or something. Like a load as been taken off my shoulders. Alls I really feel is tired and ready to go back to work.

Here's a run down on my weekend.

Friday.
1. Did 2 scrapbook pages. One is posted below.
2. Designed the 4 cards for Everything Embossed ont he 22nd.
3. Handled the current bills and set up all my bills/payments in my palm.

Saturday.
1. Cleaned out my closet. 3 bags of trash, 3 bags to Goodwill.
2.
3. Cleaned up Noah's room form the mess that Sarah made in there while Noah was with Grandpa.
4. Picked up Noah from the airport.
3.

Sunday.
1. Cleaned otu the garage. 1 truckload to Dump. 2 truckloads to Goodwill.
2. Changed out the rugs in my family room and living room to the huge, GORGEOUS asian rugs I found at Craiglist, rearranged as necessary.
4. Reorganized the kid's toys in the living room. Another Bag to Goodwill.
5. Cleaned out Sarah's room. Another bag to Goodwill.
6. Took a swim with the family where Sarah got stung by a bee. She's not allergic. Good to know :)
7. Made a pan of brownies and ate half while I stayed up till midnight cleaning up the destroyed house from all the moving stuff about.

Monday.
1. Met with the Loan guy.
2. Started on the old mail and bills. (2 bags to recycle bin)
3. Sorted all the outstanding medical bills (this was huge)
4. Did sarah's room again because my children sometimes act as if they are satan spawn and completely destroyed it in less than 12 hours.
5. Updated Palm with new obligations found while doing step #2.
6. Watched Nanny McPhee on PPV. cute!

Tuesday.
1. Reoragized personal files (bag to recycle bin) in office.
2. Cleaned Sarah's room AGAIN. I may go crazy with this one.
3. Tried to take a nap.

That's it. That was my weekend. I'd show you pictures but that little landscape button doesn't seem to be working for me dang-nabbit!

Anyway. Hope y'all had a nice restfull holiday weekend :)